If it makes you happy...

Dateline - Winging my way to Syracuse, NY - A recent article in Time Magazine that touched on happiness.

Some of the conclusions of the article:

• The more TV you watch, the less happy you are
  
  I am not convinced of this one. I guess it would depend on what you watch on TV. I would have to admit if all I watched on TV was one of the Law and Order or CSI shows, I wouldn't/couldn't be very happy. On the other hand, now that they are down to the final 12 on American Idol, I am happy. I am loving 24, and do watch The Apprentice (but it doesn't have the appeal it used to).
  
• Being younger doesn't equate to happiness
  
  I think that makes sense in so many ways. For one thing (through the eyes of this now 50 year old grizzled veteran...lol), being young these days is tough and you are still finding your way toward happiness (although when you look back and think how good you had it when you were young, you think you were happy). I do have to admit that I am currently happy with many things in my life, but I don't really think of happiness as age related.
  
• Not having enough money will make you unhappy
  
  But it also indicated that at some point money will not be a determinant of your happiness. Which I think indicates that when your basic needs are met, you don't have a bunch of stress (at least money related stress) working on your very being. Once we are past that basic necessity, at least for me, I don't need alot of money because I am not into stuff per se. I would like to put more away for retirement though. I will admit that there was a time that I was about "the chase", but those days are way past me.
  
• The fact that you are smart of have a formal education doesn't make you happy
  
  Why would it? the thought process was more learning is supposed to allow us to appreciate more, and be more satisfied with life. Frankly, I am amazed at some of the things that people think are part of the happiness process. This never would have entered my mind.
  
• Married folks are happier than singles
  
  This one surprised me a little, but maybe not. Afterall, when you are single, you are having fun, but may not necessarily be happy. If you can get to that one relationship however that completes you (and I am fortunate here), than you are happy (very happy). On the other hand, I seem to hear about an awfully lot of unhappily married folks in my travels.
  
• People who have friends or have a strong spiritual base are happier than those who don't
  
  So perhaps happiness comes when you can share the journey so to speak. Think about it, how many people do you know who have an abundance of friends who are unhappy?

The article went on to say that happiness has three components: pleasure, engagement (depth of involvement with one's family, work, romance and hobbies), and meaning (using your personal strengths to serve some larger end). Of those three, pleasure is the least consequential, and people who build their lives around pursuing pleasure may not generally end up satisfied with their lives.

So then I asked myself if I am happy. And that depends of what part of my life I am talking about. At this point however, the only unhappiness that I have comes to me from my work. No, not the people, they are great. There are just a couple of things that are eating at me in that regard.

But yea, I would have to say that overall, I am very happy. I have a family, (if you call a wife and two sweet kitty cats one), I have enough money to cover my needs, I have friends (but could always use some more :) and I don't watch that much TV (lol)

Could there be more? Could I have more happiness? Yes. But I am content and that makes me happy as well.

TTFN

A Distant Memory...

Dateline - Gainesville, GA - Perhaps my consecutive days of blogging at home are nearing an end. Because of my views on the death penalty, it is likely that I am NOT going to be selected for jury duty.

Since this was/is a death penalty case, the question was asked whether I could impose such a sentence. Truthfully, I can not. There was a time I could, but that time has long since left me.

I always come to the thought that at the end of the day, if I end up putting someone else to death, what makes me any different than that person? I would just be justifying why I killed someone (as they did if they had in fact killed a person) That is just not something that I can live with.

So, it is likely that I will be back on the road on Thursday, which is OK with me. I have taken a good number of phone calls this week from customers, so in some regards I have been working from the "home office" as they call it at my company.

Some other job opportunities have come my way and they are going to warrant serious consideration. But not until I got a bit more info. I know the pay would be even better than what I am receiving presently, but I have to think about more than just pay, so that is why I have to listen to the whole offer.

With jury duty now a distant memory, my rest time is over. But it was one that I also needed.

TTFN

The end to a great weekend...

Dateline - Gainesville, GA - It seems strange that I am actually writting two entries in a row from home. But the look towards the week ahead indicates that it could possibly be 6-7 in a row.

Yesterday was the finale to "B-day Weekend" as we call it in my house. Julie extends her's much more than I would ever think of;

• Birthday Month - The whole month of October in her case. Birthday Month is an indication that all things being equal, she gets preference.
  
• Birthday Week - Like Birthday Month, but at a higher level
  
• Birthday Weekend - Probably similar to what many people do when someone has a birthday as in letting them run your life, because you are their servant.
  
• Da Birthday - Anything goes and you do whatever you can or have to do to make the Birthday person happy.

It sounds worse than it is, because we poke fun at each other along the way, "Oh, I see, it IS your Birthday Month after all:)"

Like I said, my family was never big on birthdays and as an adult, I don't get too revved up either way when mine rolls along.

But after Saturday's "semi-surprise" party, we went to church on Sunday and then drove up to spend a glorious day outside at a friend of ours from church. They have this thing called "First Sunday" when any and everyone who wants to goes up to their place, bring a musical instrument if you play, your voice if you are inclined to sing, soup and a dessert.

It is truly a huge potluck and in the background, you are serenaded by the musicians jamming along. they also have a labrnyth they have designed on their property for you to walk if you are so inclined.

And the day was perfect for it. They live about 30 miles away in the mountains and you just couldn't have asked for a nicer way to enjoy the afternoon.

We got home around 6 and for some reason, we were both just exhausted. I fell asleep watching TV on the couch and when I did wake up, stumbled to the upstairs bedroom. (We have two beds that we switch up sleeping in from time to time. We get tired of one and agree to switch to the other until we are tired of that mattress. Does anyone else do something like that?)

The sleep served me well as I have jury duty this week. Big case, but can't talk about it now.

TTFN

Coming into a New Age!

Dateline - Gainesville, GA - Today was the big one, "five-oh". It wasn't so bad. I have had far worse birthdays than this one. But it was as good as time as any to reflect on where I have been, what lies ahead and then the question of, "How much time do I have to do it?"

I don't know about you, but my 30th birthday was the worst. At that time, I had to give up on excuses on why I wasn't where I wanted or expected to be. No grays inter-spersed (is that even a word) in my hair the way they are now. But I did have high expectations of myself. I had spend 5 years in the service, got out, worked for my parents, got a real job, quit and had a small business.

Most folks would have been satisfied. But I have always thought higher than that. I thought I should have been a millionaire by 30. I wasn't. And at the time, I was alot farther from it that I was closer. Alot farther.

So I sat in my crappy little one bedroom apartment in a major funk for a week. I went out minimally and came to the realization that achieving your goals wasn't just something you "thought" about. It was something you acted upon.

Funny thing was, 2 years later on paper at least, I was a bna fide millionaire. A friend and I started a company, working long hours at it after work almost 7 days a week for about 7 months before we took in a dime. We were fortunate (or not depending upon your perspective) to take it public when I was 32.

I was all about the dollar and the chase for it. I had read Trump's first book and others like it and I wanted to be a titan of business. We lived in California then I wanted to live in a place called Blackhawk. Blackhawk is where the pro players lived, a gated community where the homes were a million dollars (which 18 years ago was not such a common thing).

In the process of "the chase" as I have come to call it, I lost myself and almost everything that was dear to me. Fortunately, I had Julie by my side to keep the guideposts visible and had more belief in me than I ever had. Thank God for her!

Things are definitely different now. Do I have the wanderlust of wanting to build another business rather than work for others? Yes, but not for the same reason. Back then, IT WAS about making big bucks. Now, I just want something that I can spend more time with Julie, the kitty's and our friends. While money is important to enjoy things like trips that have memories attached to them, the saying I read in USA Today recently hits the nail on the head, "If it doesn't breath, it doesn't matter!"

I still have things that I want to do in life such as learn to play the piano (Julie got me one, now I have to learn to play it) start a coffee house (be part of the community) be a speaker or author (don't ask me what I would speak or write about) or to be the best husband and friend I can be (the only thing here that I am actively working on).

Life IS short. More than likely, I am into the second half of living. Kind of a sobering thought when you think about it. I think alot about my Dad who passed last September and in some ways feel cheated. He had more time with his Dad than I did. I miss him and although he did frustrate me (don't all parents do that to their children?), I wish I could still pick up the phone and have my weekly chat.

As ususual I digress - Most of the day was just being lazy. Although I did get some stuff to put on the lawn. We also looked at some new furniture and talked about where we ultimately want to live.

Julie took me out to dinner and it was the best meal I have had in a long, long time. Her company, along with the food made for a memorable meal. She then made a feeble excuse to drop by a friends' house and they had a party for me. Really, she is going to have to get alot better if she truly wants it to be a surprise. Nevertheless, it was fun having friends drop by and to meet some new folks. And I thank everyone for putting it together.

All in all, it was a wonderful day for coming into a New Age.